Chriswren

realrealsoft:

mollylambert:

NO.

you guys are assholes

aja:

PostSecret

soupsoup:

saucy:

sometimes, reddit threads are witty.

—- > If you watch The Big Lebowski backwards The Dude finally gets his rug back.

—- >If you watch Primer backwards it’s about two guys who both sit around in completely normal boxes which they somehow use to overcome health problems, lose money, and become friends. Eventually they forget how to make a superconductor and meet two other guys.

—— > If you watch Back to the Future backwards, it’s about a bunch of people who know a bunch of things that already happened.

—- > If you watch Scarface backwards, it’s about a man who gives up cocaine and crime to follow his dream of becoming a dishwasher to earn enough money so he can visit Cuba.

—— > If you watch Alien backwards, a large monster gets tiny and climbs inside a guy’s chest, calming down a panicing crew.

—- > If you watch Charlie and Chocolate Factory backwards, it’s a movie about a kid who owns a candy factory who is slowly stripped of his wealth and luck as his friends and family show up.

furrowedbrow:

mazuhl:

Ok, my one sad-sack valentine's lament

We spend the entire day together. We go from coffee shop to coffee shop to thriftstore to walks around town. We hold hands when there arent many people around and discuss what we like about each other. We talk about all of our problems and help each other with each of them. We go to each others house to do work and we pleasently sit there in silence until one has a difficulty and the other jumps at the chance to help out. We have more cigarette breaks than we need just so we can talk about something other than work. We go to dinner and have a few drink. Sitting around at the bar, talking about everything, each other, our past, what weve done wrong, what we want to do right. You lean your head on my should and place your hand on my leg. I run my hand through your hair. And its never awkward, never uncomfortable, always exactly where we want to be and what we want to do. Until you have to leave. Until we have that last cigarette before you or I walk out the door. Then we always have silence. Not the comfortable silence where you just happy to be sitting next to me. But silence because neither of wants to talk at this moment. Because talking is not what we want to do. We both know we cant do what it is we should be doing at that point. And this has happend almost every other day for the past month. And its not going to end, because your going home to that tall smiley faced souless douche that treats you like an ornament. And you will continue to do so.

sorry about that guys.

“ Homosexuality is one of the essential elements of living in contemporary society.

—

IKEA spokesperson telling Catholics to piss off after asking queer couples be removed from their catalogue. (via girlfriendisahomo) (via amandalynferri) (via spytap)

That’s awesome.

(via tanya77)

(via soupsoup)

Bob Odenkirk Milk Machine Song (via bennyhaha55)

and the amazing finale

The Farm House Musical (via monkey711)

instead of valentines, im celebrating this.

ckck:

The Brain Depository on 43rd Street. After 5:00 PM slip brains through slot in door.

Brainland’s headquarters

tanya77:

thedailywhat:

Lunch Links:

Dozens of computers stolen from Los Alamos nuclear weapons lab.

Stem cells cure man’s leukemia, stop progression of AIDS.

Two satellites collide in first event of its kind.

Follow-Up: First woman to swim across the Atlantic did no such thing.

If you just got over your fear of comets hitting earth, you may want to skip this article.

Kid rescues drowning sister by emulating CPR moves he saw on TV.

In Related News: European parliament says video games are good for kids.

So. PA transit authority uses New York skyline on Philly Beer Week day pass.

Prison offers inmates books on how to escape from prison.

Man robs gas station, runs out of gas while making getaway.

Man convinces woman he’s the drummer for Foreigner, steals her car.

Teacher uses school property to moonlight as prostitute; fired after skipping class to meet with john.

Police break into woman’s home after confusing her singing for screaming.

Baby seal develops fear of fish.

Lunch List: Black History Month: 5 Must-See Underrated Movies.

[photo via.]

» How the US economic and political systems almost collapsed completely on September 18th, 2008

(via cajunboy)

reckon:

Fragmenty holograficznej róży

What the woman of my dreams says every morning….. or will say.. someday

The real question is

How do pennies keep getting in my shower?

Test:

tanya77:

Is It NBA Or NFL?

36
have been accused of spousal abuse

7
have been arrested for fraud

19
have been accused of writing bad checks

117
have directly or indirectly
bankrupted at least 2 businesses

3
have done time for assault

71,
repeat

71 cannot
get a credit card due to bad credit

14
have been arrested on drug-related charges

8
have been arrested for shoplifting

21
currently
are defendants in lawsuits, and

84
have been arrested for drunk driving
in
the last year

Can
you guess which organization this is?

Give
up yet? . . Scroll down,

Neither,
it’s the 435 members of the
United States Congress

The
same group of Idiots that crank out
hundreds of new laws each year
designed to keep the rest of us in line.